[{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"BlogPosting","@id":"https:\/\/equallywed.com\/advice-from-equally-weds-real-wedding-alums\/#BlogPosting","mainEntityOfPage":"https:\/\/equallywed.com\/advice-from-equally-weds-real-wedding-alums\/","headline":"Advice from Equally Wed\u2019s Real Wedding Alums","name":"Advice from Equally Wed\u2019s Real Wedding Alums","description":"Who better to offer wedding planning advice than those who just said \u201cI do\u201d? We asked some of our favorite couples from Real Weddings\u2019 past...","datePublished":"2012-06-12","dateModified":"2021-07-08","author":{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/equallywed.com\/author\/admin\/#Person","name":"Equally Wed","url":"https:\/\/equallywed.com\/author\/admin\/","identifier":787,"image":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ca62cf123aaaf135c80b055249bacbda79de9226e11cdfcde6529bedf89683de?s=96&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/ca62cf123aaaf135c80b055249bacbda79de9226e11cdfcde6529bedf89683de?s=96&r=g","height":96,"width":96}},"publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"Equally Wed","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"http:\/\/equallywed.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/equally-wed-lgbtq-weddings-logo.jpg","url":"http:\/\/equallywed.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/08\/equally-wed-lgbtq-weddings-logo.jpg","width":218,"height":60}},"image":{"@type":"ImageObject","@id":"http:\/\/equallywed.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/lauren-lauren-real-gay-wedding-advice.jpg","url":"http:\/\/equallywed.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/lauren-lauren-real-gay-wedding-advice.jpg","height":"","width":"450"},"url":"https:\/\/equallywed.com\/advice-from-equally-weds-real-wedding-alums\/","about":["Getting Started"],"wordCount":1497,"keywords":["advice","LGBTQ weddings","real weddings"],"articleBody":"Who better to offer wedding planning advice than those who just said \u201cI do\u201d? We asked some of our favorite couples from Real Weddings\u2019 past what pieces of advice they\u2019d offer to the newly engaged.Their vows have been said, their wedding cakes have been eaten and they\u2019ve taken their first spin on the dance floor as husband-and-husband or wife-and-wife. They\u2019re our Real Weddings alums and they know firsthand the ups and downs that come with planning a wedding. Take heed their words of wisdom as you begin your own wedding planning journey toward \u201cI do.\u201d\u00a0Lauren and Lauren, married Sept. 16, 2011 in Old Saybrook, Conn.: \u201cCommunication is key. You don\u2019t always have to see eye to eye, but respect for each other\u2019s needs and feelings goes a long way,\u201d says Lauren. \u201cAlways take time to remember why you want to get married in the first place. Don\u2019t get too swept up in the stress of planning and details. It will come together and it will be the perfect wedding, because you love each other and all the people who love you will be there with you. That\u2019s what matters the most.\u201dView Lauren and Lauren’s wedding here. >>Jay and Paul, married Sept. 18, 2011 in Garrison, N.Y.: \u201cMap out all deadlines (and then meet them) as though the wedding is several weeks earlier than it really is. Then all the big pieces are set and you can start to hold the greater sense of what your wedding is, instead of being consumed by stressful details in the final weeks leading into the big day itself,\u201d advises Paul. \u201cJay urged me to join him in taking this approach as a couple, we mostly succeeded, and I ended up being extremely glad for it.\u201dView Jay and Paul’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Annie and Sylvia, married Sept. 30, 2010 in Long Beach, Calif.: \u201cMy biggest piece of advice to engaged couples is to have fun with it. We involved our friends in every aspect of the wedding from the cake, the music, the officiant and decorations,\u201d says Annie. \u201cMake it special and meaningful for you two, and don\u2019t follow every tradition just because you think you should,\u201d adds Sylvia.View Annie and Sylvia’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Kelsey and Leigh, married June 20, 2011 in Newport, R.I.: \u201cConsider a Monday wedding. Venues and vendors are often less busy and more willing to work with you on a budget because they wouldn\u2019t normally be able to book a wedding on that day,\u201d explains Kelsey. \u201cMany of our guests also took the opportunity to spend a few days in Newport and everyone said that they had a wonderful time.\u201dView Kelsey and Leigh’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Glenn and Michael, married Aug. 5, 2011 in Jacksonville, Fla.: \u201cWith all the amazing food we had, we unfortunately only got to enjoy a few food items. We learned that you must have someone prepare you a full plate so you can eat!\u201d says Michael.View Glenn and Michael’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Kim and Randie, married Sept. 18, 2011 in Hudson, N.Y.: \u201cAt a certain point you have to let go a little and know that it will all be beautiful and you will love your wedding no matter what happens, in fact you will love it more for its imperfections (much like the way you love partner),\u201d says Kim. \u201cAlso never forget that the day is about the two of you. That means adding personal touches as much as it means that you control your budget, your theme, your menu. You set the price not your vendors, if they can\u2019t work with your budget or ideas then find someone else who can. Don\u2019t go into debt for your wedding and don\u2019t have a wedding that doesn\u2019t feel like you.\u201dView Kim and Randie’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Shavonda and Naomi, married Aug. 25, 2011 in Sacramento, Calif.: \u201cMy number one piece of advice\u2014get help! Don’t try to take on everything yourself or else you can end up doing your hair in your car mirror! Seriously though, don’t wear yourself thin. Also remember it\u2019s your day. Make it about what you and your partner want. Your guests are there to support you and at the end of the day, no one remembers the monogramed napkins or the extra seat cushion you splurged on\u2014what they remember is how in love you looked and whether or not your wedding felt like \u2018you,\u2019\u201d says Shavonda. \u201cBe patient with one another,\u201d advises Naomi. \u201cWedding planning can be super stressful and remember your wedding should be a reflection of the two of you and the love you share, nothing else. Also, a friend of mine told me to remember to take a moment and sit back and observe. He said things move so fast and when the day is gone you feel like you were so busy that you missed it. So on your big day, have a seat or lean on the wall and just watch your guests enjoy themselves and celebrate your love. I took his advice and I can actually say I don’t feel like I missed a moment.\u201dView Shavonda and Naomi’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Kevin and Pete, married on Oct. 10, 2011 in Lincoln, Mass.: \u201cGo with your heart and stay within your financial budget and make sure that both people\u2019s wants and desires are represented in the planning of the ceremony,\u201d advises Pete. \u201cAlso, pick your battles. Our music system for the processional in the Italian garden would not work and Kevin did freak out a bit (groomzilla!!) but then realized that there was nothing that could be done,\u201d he laughs. \u201cWe chatted with people as we walked down the aisle with our mothers. It was a funny and unique processional.\u201d Kevin recommends having formal portraits done beforehand. \u201cWe did all of our formal pictures with our families and wedding party before the ceremony so that way we were able to enjoy all of the reception and not miss out on anything.\u201dView Kevin and Pete’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Dana and Cynthia, married Sept. 24, 2011 in Brooklyn, N.Y.: \u201cMost likely, things will come up and changes will happen and there won\u2019t be a thing you can do about it! Our officiant had to cancel two days before our wedding because her mother passed away. Instead of freaking out we took it in stride and were able to find someone else in a matter of hours who did an amazing job,\u201d says Dana. \u201cNo matter what your wedding day will be wonderful because you are marrying the person you love with all of your heart. And even if your day isn\u2019t as perfect as you hoped, it\u2019s only one day and, really, marriage isn\u2019t about the wedding. It\u2019s about the lifetime together after that day.\u201dView Dana and Cynthia’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Jamie and Carrie, married Sept. 16, 2011 in Atlanta, Ga.: \u201cIt might be wise to keep the honeymoon more simple and relaxing, because the last thing you will have energy for at the end of the wedding is being a tourist and sightseeing and all that travel,\u201d says Carrie. She also advises to make a point to schedule moments for just the two of you. \u201cIt\u2019s really easy to neglect the relationship when you get that busy and stressed with wedding planning.\u201dView Jaime and Carrie’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Nick and Paul, married Oct. 22, 2011 in Palm Springs, Calif.: \u201cAbove and beyond, the biggest thing you must have is a day-of coordinator. You may not think you need it or that you can afford it, but you do, so find it in the budget. On the day itself, with emotions running so high, the last thing you want to be thinking of is timelines and details,\u201d advises Paul.\u201cRealize that planning your wedding is a very specific chapter of your life that you won\u2019t ever have again. You\u2019ll only register once, you\u2019ll only do one food tasting, and you won\u2019t ever make an invitation list like this one again. When you realize that all the preparation is in itself, a journey, you won\u2019t stress about everything you have to do as much,\u201d says Nick. \u201cAnd for the moments where you may forget to have fun or you may argue with your fianc\u00e9, you must realize that planning your wedding is yet another way you are going to grow as a couple and get to know your soul mate a little bit more. And that is invaluable.\u201dView Nick and Paul’s wedding here. >>\u00a0Photo: Alissa Dinneen Photography; Fedorov Foto; Rachel McCauley Photography; Carla Ten Eyck Photography; Kyle Bromley; Bre Sessions; Sara Maren Photographers; Kristin Korpos Photography; Hudson River Photographer; Alli Royce Soble; The Long Haul Photo\u00a0"},{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org\/","@type":"BreadcrumbList","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Advice from Equally Wed\u2019s Real Wedding Alums","item":"https:\/\/equallywed.com\/advice-from-equally-weds-real-wedding-alums\/#breadcrumbitem"}]}]