Q My fiancée and I spent all this time registering for amazing products, but now we’re not allowed to tell anyone about it. What gives?

A It’s true that it’s tacky to bring it up to your guests about what kind of gifts you’d like for the wedding. That’s what your lovely friends, family and wedding Web site are for—to spread the word. Do keep in mind that your enclosure card in your invitation envelope shouldn’t mention your registry (nor should your invitation). Keep it discreet on your Web site with a modest section for Registry. An important thing to note is that wedding gifts aren’t required; only shower gifts are (because that’s the purpose of a shower). So don’t make your guests uncomfortable by acting like you expect gifts. Registering is merely a system of selecting items you’d love for your home as you and your partner build upon your newly committed life together, should your loved ones need suggestions. Don’t worry that your guests won’t find your registry. If they want to buy a gift for you, they will seek out your registry information.

Kirsten Ott Palladino is the co-founder and editor in chief of Equally Wed, the nation’s leading gay and lesbian wedding and honeymoon magazine. Follow her on Twitter. Connect with her on Facebook. Write her with your gay wedding questions. If she can’t answer it, she’ll find another expert who can!