Q My partner and I are in the process of planning our wedding, and we are thinking about having the most fabulous drag show ever seen at a wedding during the cocktail hour of our wedding. My question is, do you think that this would be fun and appropriate for such an elegant event considering there will be straight and gay/lesbian friends and family in attendance?

A Yes, honey! What a fun idea. This is your day to personalize however you want, so if you and your partner have an appreciation for the art of drag—go for it! However, you must establish ground rules with your queens or kings. It’s not the lip synching, the false lashes, the heels, the bean-filled bras and the sashaying men’s hips that’ll make your straight guests cringe. It’s the talking on the mic between the songs that you need to focus on. You know how, ahem, vocal our favorite drag queens can get … talking about tucking, muff diving, tops/bottoms or they single out guests for their looks. It’s all fun and games when we’re watching drag shows in a club and we know what to expect, but it might be more than your straight friends and family can handle. And though you want this to be entertaining for your guests, you also don’t want it to be the main attraction (that’s what you and your sweetheart are). You also have to make sure the standout memory of your entire wedding isn’t how your Uncle Ned nearly choked on his pinot grigio when Miss Alexandria Lovely started picking on him for looking like he doesn’t get laid often enough. So hire performers you can have an open communication with and trust, and then eat, drink and be married!

Kirsten Ott Palladino is the co-founder and editor in chief of Equally Wed, the nation’s leading gay and lesbian wedding and honeymoon magazine. Follow her on Twitter. Connect with her on Facebook. Write her with your gay wedding questions. If she can’t answer it, she’ll find another expert who can!