The Equally Wed LGBTQ+ wedding anniversary gift list
Equally Wed has presented the history of anniversary gifts and used the well-established traditional and modern gift lists to offer first-anniversary gift suggestions. It’s time for us to take the reins and go further.
As the community paves its way in establishing wedding and marriage traditions of our own, what better way to acknowledge and celebrate the modernity of LGBTQ+ marriage than with an updated list of suggested anniversary gifts by year?
From what we can tell, this is the first list of wedding anniversary gifts (for any kind of marriage) compiled during the twenty-first century.
The items listed are practical and all-encompassing. They have been included with the consideration of mind, body and soul, for a list that is comprised of the meaningful, the material and the experiential.
The Equally Wed LGBTQ+ Wedding Anniversary Gift List was made with the evolution of the human lifespan in mind—the earlier years include items that will help establish a long life together, and later years offering opportunities for nostalgia, reflection and comfort.
As you may notice, every five years calls for a bigger ticket item. After all, milestones are a pretty big deal! However, this list, just like the others, is merely a suggestion. Feel free to take these gifts as literally as you’d like or to insert your own interpretation and sense of enjoyment into them.
Finally, after a decades-long fight for marriage equality, and in an effort to keep in mind that our work for visibility and equality is not done, the colors of the six-color Pride Flag (1979 version), along with the colors of the Trans Flag have also been incorporated. While we enjoy the freedom of having our marriages recognized, it’s important that we not take that for granted, and acknowledge the effort needed to get to this point.
We invite you to take great liberty in using this and to honor and celebrate marriage as a cherished and highly revered bond.
Whether you are on your first or fiftieth, we wish you always a happy anniversary.
Year 1: Houseplant
Let this be a reminder that your relationship also requires great care for it to thrive. May it grow strong and tall and brighten up your lives over your time together.
Year 2: Blankets/bedding
An investment in the most personal and safest of sanctuaries. This gift will provide shared warmth and protection.
Year 3: Luggage
Your relationship is still young! In preparation for a lifetime of adventures as you explore the world and your relationship together.
Year 4: Cookware
For a lifetime of physical nourishment that you will offer each other.
Year 5: Technology
May this gift offer a reminder of the state of a healthy marriage: practical, but ever-changing.
Year 6: Red item
We pay homage to the colors of the Pride Flag and give thought and thanks to those who have paved the way for marriage equality throughout history. This year, we offer gifts that are red in color, which was intended by the flag’s designer to symbolize “life.”
Year 7: Undergarments
A most confidential gift—a reminder that honesty and intimacy are pillars of a successful marriage.
Year 8: Music
Appeal to beauty in all senses. Live or recorded, listening or playing, singing or dancing, experience your love through music.
Year 9: Sport/Exercise
Because we need working bodies to live long and healthy lives for ourselves and for each other.
Year 10: Timepiece/watch
With the gift of a watch or timepiece, be reminded of the passage of time, to not take life or your marriage for granted, and to live fully in every moment.
Year 11: Cultural experience
A new city. A different type of cuisine. A museum visit. A new bar or restaurant. An orchestral performance. The ballet. As part of your relationship, you know what you enjoy.
Year 12: Orange item
This year, we offer gifts that are orange in color, which was intended by the Pride Flag’s designer on symbolizing “healing.”
Year 13: Candle
To ensure that the spark of your love and relationship continues to burn bright.
Year 14: Linens
Fresh linens to refresh your lives together.
Year 15: Furniture
Ad0rn your home with a piece of furniture that meets your needs and is as strong and sturdy as the commitment you have shown to your marriage.
Year 16: Yellow item
This year, we offer gifts that are yellow in color, which was intended by the Pride Flag’s designer on symbolizing “sunlight.”
Year 17: An adventure!
To keep things fresh and to strengthen your shared bond, try a new experience together!
Year 18: Live performance
While viewing a live performance of some kind (music, magic, theater), be reminded to continue to live in the moment.
Year 19: Black or brown item
For this year, we take a break from the colors of the traditional Pride Flag to give thought to our siblings of color, as they too have been honored on different iterations of the Pride Flag and, more significantly, have faced an uphill battle in the realms of visibility and acceptance. In addition to celebrating our own anniversaries through gift-giving to our spouses, let us also take time to reflect on the progress they have made, and any progress we can work toward making as a community on their behalf.
Year 20: Travel
Celebrate two whole decades on a trip somewhere. Be sure to enjoy each other’s company, and of course experience some rest and relaxation.
Year 21: An outing with your biggest supporter
Every member of any relationship has folks to lean on in times of need. Now that your marriage would be old enough to be an adult, take those folks out and make some memories.
Year 22: Beverage
May your love flow freely. May it be as rich as a well-crafted beverage. May it be as robust as the soil it took to grow what was needed to create this gift.
Year 23: Light blue, light pink or white item
We take another break from the colors of the traditional Pride Flag to give thought to our trans siblings. They too have faced an uphill battle in the realms of visibility and acceptance. In addition to celebrating our own anniversaries through gift-giving to our spouses, let us also take time to reflect on the progress they have made, and any progress we can work toward making as a community on their behalf.
Year 24: Go back to where it all started
Making it this many years, you have undoubtedly had a beautiful history with your love, and depending on your age (and luck), you have plenty more time to go. This is a perfect time to return to the town or city you met and if you’re lucky enough (and the locale is still in existence), enjoy a re-do of your first date. Reflect on how far you have come, and how much more you still have to savor with one another.
Year 25: Silver
The first of three holdovers from the traditional and modern anniversary gift list—honor your marriage and the tradition of marriage as a whole (as well as the centuries-long tradition of the silver anniversary) by presenting gifts made of silver. May your marriage continue to shine, and may you continue to shine in marriage.
Year 26: Spice
In an effort to keep things “spiced up,” utilize new ingredients in the kitchen. Feel free to use your own interpretation this year.
Year 27: Green item
This year, we offer gifts that are green in color, which was intended by the Pride Flag’s designer on symbolizing nature.
Year 28: Couples’ photos
You and your marriage are aging like fine wine. Invest in a photoshoot with a photographer. Have fun shooting pictures with your love and don’t be shy about showing them off later on, either. You have so much to celebrate!
Year 29: Fashion accessories
Be sure your love stays presentable and impresses not just you but everyone around with stylish and impeccable attention to detail.
Year 30: Honeymoon return or second honeymoon
What an accomplishment and a true sign of commitment (and they said we couldn’t do it!). Treat yourselves to a second honeymoon with all the fixings.
Year 31: Blue item
This year, we offer gifts that are blue in color, which was intended by the Pride Flag’s designer on symbolizing “harmony.”
Year 32: Flatware and dishes
A new clean set of dishes and utensils to help in the nourishment of your body and soul.
Year 33: Charitable donation and dinner out
It is important not to lose the memory of the work it took for members of the LGBTQ+ community to be able to marry. Enjoy a dinner out, and pay it forward by helping a cause within the community.
Year 34: Outdoor adventure
The word adventure can mean so many things, but the goal here is to connect with the great outdoors with your love. For the more active couple, hiking up a new trail or kayaking might be in order. Or, if you’re looking for rest and relaxation, perhaps a picnic or viewing of a fireworks show will suffice.
Year 35: Transportation
A bigger ticket item, for sure, but whether it’s a bicycle or a scooter, a motorcycle or a vehicle, a train ride or a plane ride this year, may this gift be a reminder that life is less stagnant than we sometimes take it to be. It is always important to consider life’s trajectory into the future, both as individuals and within marriage.
Year 36: Purple item
This year, we offer gifts that are purple in color, which was intended by the Pride Flag’s designer on symbolizing “spirit.”
Year 37: Art
May you find or create something that is worthy of display, something that mirrors the beauty of the commitment and loyalty you have cultivated in your years married.
Year 38: Personal care/spa experience
In an effort to help each other continue to feel beautiful and our physical best.
Year 39: Home upgrade(s)
You have made a home together. Be sure to keep it thriving. Perhaps the walls need painting, or the kitchen or bathroom needs an update. Your home is your sanctuary!
Year 40: Front row seats
A showing of a movie of your favorite genre. A musical/theater production. A sporting event. The rollercoaster you’ve always loved together. Whatever it is you enjoy, get yourselves to the front. You deserve to enjoy every moment of it!!
Year 41: Homemade or hand-built item
Perhaps a more challenging gift idea, this one will surely come from the heart. Offer something that has taken workmanship and on the part of the individual, another reminder of the care you take within your marriage.
Year 42: Go back to where it all started
As we progress in age, let this be a reminder of the start of everything you have invested within your relationship. Perhaps this means a return to the town or city you met your love, or if you’re lucky enough and the locale is still in existence, a re-do of your first date. Honor yourselves and the life you have devoted to each other.
Year 43: Relaxation
A massage or spa treatment might be a good place to start here, though maybe you and your love have discovered different definitions of relaxation over your time together. Perhaps you’d like a gift that keeps on giving—a new recliner, a hammock, a chaise lounge.
Year 44: Magazine, periodical, box subscription
Help each other to stay current, stay interested, stay sharp.
Year 45: Appliances
Be sure to establish a secure and comfortable future as you continue to evolve together.
Year 46: Letters to each other
No gifts are better than those from the heart. Share your love in the written word and reflect on memories over the course of your life together.
Year 47: Something vintage
A fine wine, an old movie, a first-edition book. After 47 years, may this be a reminder that existence is more than its age in years, and that substance behind existence is what matters most.
Year 48: Warmth
A blanket, an outdoor fire pit, a new coat or jacket. Keep your love warm.
Year 49: Thanks and pride
The gift this year is up to your interpretation. Coming up on fifty years, find a way to give thanks to (and for) each other and to those who paved the way for marriage among those who identify as LGBTQ+. In addition to Pride in the sense of our community, take pride in 49 years of marriage.
Year 50: Gold
The second of three traditional anniversary gifts in Equally Wed’s anniversary gift list. Honor your marriage and the tradition of marriage as a whole (as well as the centuries-long tradition of the Golden Anniversary) by presenting gifts made of gold. May your marriage continue to shine.
Year 51: Classic entertainment
Though not physically venturing to where your relationship once began, return to your common interests. Bring out the movies, television, and music you once bonded over.
Year 52: Light
Light fixtures. Lamps. Candles. Let your love continue to shine brightly.
Year 53: Candy
Don’t ever forget how sweet love can be.
Year 54: Photographs of your past
Look back and celebrate all of the memories you have made over the course of your marriage.
Year 55: Comfort
As you age together, be sure you do so in comfort. New pillows and blankets, or perhaps a new lounge chair might be a good start. You have much to be proud of.
Year 56: Homemade baked goods
The only thing sweeter than candy is what you can make on your own—or together. Enjoy the process and the output.
Year 57: Elegance
Indulge on a date of epic proportions—smart-looking attire, your favorite upscale dining experience, and if you can, splurge for the ride there and back.
Year 58: Books
It is never too late to read a new story or to learn something new.
Year 59: Playing cards and board games
There are always ways to have fun with one another in marriage. May these gifts help you to continue to find new ways.
Year 60: Diamond
The third of the holdovers from the traditional and modern anniversary gift lists. Treat yourselves to diamonds, which— similarly to the love you have held for one another for six decades and beyond—are unbreakable.
William Travers (pen name) and his husband Matthew were married at The Piermont in Babylon, New York, in August 2019. At that point, they had been together for nearly five years. William is a public school teacher on Long Island, and Matthew works at a nearby university. Together they blissfully enjoy shared interests in television, travel and food.
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An anniversary sundial is a good idea, it is a clock that tells time using the sun. We have one that sits on the window sill in our family room and it makes rainbows in the room when the sun shines. It was handmade for us with a special date line that the time shadow follows on our anniversary day each year, and there is also a mark on that line that the shadow touches at the actual moment of our ceremony. We’ve had it for several years, it works great, and we enjoy it every sunny day. I don’t remember what it is called exactly, but you can find it online with a search. It is one of the best anniversary gifts that I have ever heard of, and every year when the shadow hits the mark we drink a toast together!