Reader Question: My future husband’s sister wants to be in our wedding party, however, there are a few issues I have with this.
She’ll be the only female (won’t that look weird in pictures?) and her and I don’t exactly get along. She’s prone to drama and I don’t want any on my wedding day. I should note that we’re also selecting our wedding party together, as opposed to having separate sides. What should I do?
Editor Answer: What’s great about same-sex weddings is that any gender can be on any side of the wedding party (though, I’ve noticed even straight couples have started to follow our lead) so don’t be afraid to have mixed gender groomspeople. As long as the outfits are cohesive, the photographs will turn out great. Take a cue from Cynthia and Dana’s wedding (pictured above) which had six bridesmaids in flirty lavender frocks and one maid of honor and one man of honor, Cynthia’s brother, in luxe navy.
It’s understandable that you don’t want drama on your big day, but whether you like it or not, she is going to soon be family. If you have room in the wedding party, she should be included, otherwise you’ll be dealing with the diss at family gatherings for years to come. Enlist one of your attendants to be on drama duty to ensure she doesn’t get in the way of your special day. Of course, I wouldn’t push out a VIP (i.e. your best friend who introduced the two of you and truly deserves to be up there) in order to make room. If there simply isn’t space at the altar, kindly explain to her that the wedding party has already been selected but you really want her to be a part of your wedding. Duties you can give her include doing a reading during the ceremony, being a guestbook attendant, or doing a toast at the reception.
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Photo: Real Wedding Cynthia and Dana, photography by Hudson River Photography
