Wesley and Jim’s wedding was a perfect display of casual elegance with tan, black and neutral hues incorporating wood tones, and the surrounding landscape and architecture. After 25 years together, the two expats married in their adopted hometown of San Miguel de Allende, Mexico. Their engagement came from a mutual proposal after a number of years of speaking about it, the couple shared with Equally Wed, noting that it was after Mexico legally recognized same-sex marriage.

grooms with their dog

expat grooms on their wedding day in san miguel de allende, mexico

Wesley and Jim didn’t always live in Mexico though. “We met at a casual party of mutual friends,” they shared. “A completely unexpected immediate connection! Our time together has taken us to many places. We met in 1996 in San Francisco, Jim in the corporate world, Wesley prepping for graduate school. We moved to New York and Shelter Island where we met many wonderful friends. When Howard and Lynne moved to San Miguel, we ended up buying a ‘retirement home’ here. Seventeen years later, we are definitely not retired, but we are still here, surrounded by dear friends and family.”

two grooms lean in foreheads touching on their wedding day with cactus in background

On their wedding day, a sunny afternoon in May, the two grooms got ready together wearing complementing suits. Their boutonnieres and wedding flowers matched the casual elegance with white florals and lush greenery, an easygoing aesthetic for their outdoor wedding. Before the ceremony, guests were entertained with live music and giant papier-mâché puppets, a Mexican tradition for celebrations known as Monos de Calendas.

monos de calendas (oversized papier-mâché puppets) at wedding

“For Jim and Wesley, it wasn’t so much about the details. When you wed in the stunning city of San Miguel de Allende, there’s so much amazing architecture, scenic views and beautifully landscaped courtyards and gardens. Not much else is truly needed.”

spanish fountain greenery white flowers wedding

“But it was more than that. This couple wanted it to be about their beautiful life lived together and their journey to the aisle after 25 years! Their wedding ceremony was intimate and sentimental as their family and friends watched teary-eyed during their vows. And their reception was a true party to celebrate this couple finally making it official!”

Wesley walked down the aisle with his parents, and Jim followed with his son and his brother. During their ceremony, the dapper grooms spoke handwritten wedding vows to one another.

black and white photo of two grooms holding hands and saying their wedding vows

Jim’s Vows

Wesley, from the day we met, I knew we’d be together. It’s been a fun, adventurous 25 years.

You have stood by me with the greatest of love and support.

I promise to do the same and will hold our love above all else. I will continue to work to bring joy and laughter into your life and to help create a warm and loving home.

As we move into our next adventures, I look forward to our strong partnership and the love and support of our family and friends.

groom laughing at his wedding

Wesley’s Vows:
Jim, you have been my partner, my best friend, and my co-adventurer for the last 25 years. We have spent nearly every day together, enjoying the good times and supporting each other through the hard times. We have shared incredible adventures, and life has never been boring with you.

I love that you stand by me in this crazy world we live in. I love the way that you laugh. I love that you are fiercely loyal and a great friend to me and to your chosen family. I vow to continue to support you, to love you through good times and bad times, to continue to build a beautiful life together with community, adventure, and laughter.

black and white photo of two grooms holding hands and saying their wedding vows and putting their wedding rings on

two grooms kiss after getting married in Mexico

two grooms recessional after saying i do at outdoor wedding

Jim and Wesley’s guests dined on Mexican culinary delights including bicolor roasted corn soup with chile poblano cream, sea bass with butter sauce, capers and a touch of lime and risotto of coriander.

green and white wedding reception dinner menu

The wedding reception was held outdoors on the lawn with wooden tables decorated with greenery, white flowers and candles, and the mirrored dance floor was sheltered under a tent with lighting and hanging greenery.

light wood and cream chairs, greenery and white flowers on wooden tables at outdoor wedding reception

dance floor and tables at tented wedding reception

The newlyweds shared their first dance as husband and husband to Elton John’s “Rocket Man” and “Cold Heart (Pnau remix)” by Elton John and Dua Lipa.

first dance for gay expat grooms after their wedding in san miguel de allende, mexico

grooms dance at their wedding in san miguel de allende, mexico

dancing grooms at their wedding in san miguel de allende, mexico

dancing grooms at their wedding in san miguel de allende, mexico

grooms kiss at their wedding in san miguel de allende, mexico

grooms hug at their wedding in san miguel de allende, mexico

The gay grooms offered this advice for LGBTQ+ couples planning their weddings: “Do it with love. Gently together.”

LGBTQ+ Inclusive Wedding Vendors & Venues


Ceremony and Reception Venue: Hotel Villas Santa Monica, San Miguel de Allende
Jewelry: Tiffany & Co.
Suits: The Bespoke Company México
Shoes: Adriana Soto
Photographer: Ricardo Arellano
Florist: Angelica Solache
Planner, Design, Stationery, Cake: Penzi Weddings